Perhaps this is one of those unwritten rules that we as women know about but don’t talk about. Or perhaps it is something that we pretend doesn’t impact how we deal with our day to day life, or maybe there are more of you like me who just honestly didn’t recognize just how much shark week or even the few days prior to really affect how you interact with your partners. Of course I very often share far too much, especially if I am in person and have a glass of wine or two, but let me go down this road anyways. I have figured out a pattern that it took me to be single to really hone in on. That pattern is this; I am confident, self assured, and feeling sexy for approximately 3 weeks out of the month. Then BAM! 4 -5 days prior to my period I get feelings of insecurity, I tear up more easily and I have zero interest in meeting new people. I have to force myself to be a social butterfly, and I tend to reminisce on past people in my life. I fantasize more about men I already know and put ourselves into situations (in my mind only) where things would work out in a more long term future base. Then I get my period and 2 or 3 days later I am back to my confident and happy self.
I have read a few books as of late; specifically Sex at Dawn, and A Billion Wicked Thoughts, that from a male’s perspective touch a bit on how intrinsically a female is more selective in her mates when she is ovulating. That I woman will actually increase sperm competition as well, at an almost sub conscious during this time in her cycle and will be more apt to cheat or seek a mate that has physical traits that she wants versus the nurturing gene of her current partner. This I have read, and I recognize it, but always from a male perspective. And the truth is, although I see the signs, I guess I just never put much thought into any other part of a females cycle. That is until the stability of having a partner was gone and I was left alone with my thoughts, and for what it is worth, my body.
I, for some reason or another like to think of myself as logical and independent. I often kid myself that I am above crying or having a hormonal response to situations in my life. There are current studies that are being done to test that some women actually have an elevated testosterone level that increases their drive towards competition and thus they are better designed for the business world. I naturally have assumed for years that I am just one of these women. That I do not have these so called uncontrollable feelings, and I have put a lot on the back burner as a result. I am very sad to admit that I may have a few days each month where my logical side goes out the window.
I have a tendency to be more clingy, to be less confident, and less willing to stand on my own two feet for about 5 to 6 days every month. Looking back it makes the most perfect sense in terms of avoiding risks especially. If I had been more aware of these issues (I use the word issue incredibly loosely), I think I would have been better able to predict arguments or times in a relationship that I would be less equipped to handle new or unknown situations. However, being that I am stubborn and fought my own hormones I had absolutely no idea. Funny the things that you learn about yourself when you are alone. Based on this new knowledge though, I have a bit more sympathy for men who are trying to date women. In general do woman really know this about themselves? Are most of us ladies able to predict or to anticipate these hormonal changes prior to and surrounding our shark week? I used to have a co-worker who would track on a calendar whenever his mostly female workplace were menstruating, I will admit that I think that was one very wise man.